Download Diary of a Wimpy Vampire by Tim Collins PDF

By Tim Collins

Like Edward Cullen in "Twilight", Nigel Mullet used to be reworked right into a vampire while he used to be nonetheless undefined, and may stay this age endlessly. regrettably, Nigel grew to become a vampire on the awkward age of fifteen, and needs to spend eternity dealing with pimples, a breaking voice, and an ineptitude with girls...In this, his excruciatingly humorous diary, Nigel chronicles his more and more determined makes an attempt to be spotted via the affection of his lifestyles, Chloe Sparrow, the consistent mortification because of his vampire mom and dad (not to say the concern that they may by accident consume one in every of his friends), and the disappointment one feels whilst you've acquired the complete of dull eternity stretching out in entrance of you and also you can't actually have a lie in (vampires don't sleep). pressured to hang around with the Goths and emo young ones as a result of his light dermis and social awkwardness, and consistently struggling with his embarrassingly overwhelming wish to sink his fangs into Chloe's neck, will Nigel ever get his woman? beautifully witty and highly input tanning, this enjoyable and available diary will attract any fan of "Twilight" or "Adrian Mole", teenage or in a different way.

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Additional resources for Diary of a Wimpy Vampire

Example text

I went at night. There was no one on the streets. I wondered where the people were. The streetlights were like moons cupped in iron fingers. Behind Janina’s house there was no light at all. I ran my hand across the step. I felt something. I put it in my pocket. I put the bread on the step. I looked up at the window, but it was even darker than the night. Somewhere in the house Janina was sleeping. I waved at the dark, empty window and went away. Back on the street, I heard a shout. I turned. Someone stood up the street, in shadow.

Candy he stole just for me. When I found a hazelnut buttercream, I could hardly chew it for laughing. I used to see the brown paper bread bags everywhere I went. Now there were not so many. One day when I snatched a loaf of bread, the lady called after me, “Stop! ” I stopped. I turned and faced her. I shouted back as sternly as I could. “I’m not a dirty Jew! I’m a Gypsy! ” She threw her hands in the air. She called out to the people on the sidewalk. “A dirty Gypsy! ” She started running after me.

Olek had Kuba wrapped like an octopus, Kuba squealing and flailing. Kuba grabbed Ferdi’s leg and bit it. Ferdi screamed, and in a moment everyone but Uri and grim-faced Enos was on the ground, even me with my leash. We laughed and bit and wrestled, and I think we must have looked like one squirming creature with many heads, arms, and legs. At last we peeled apart and flopped to the ground, exhausted and laughing. My ear was bleeding again and hurting. I pressed a fistful of dry grass to it. Except for Kuba, we sat on the ground and talked and laughed and smoked our cigarettes.

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