By Matthew Revert
Among those covers lies a cornucopia of wonders. Step right into a international that defies all common sense. one in every of masturbatory headphones, diabolically toppled comb-jars, moustache-filled ejaculations, malfunctioning bookmarks, bricolage scrotums, wank fairies and a poorly conceived concept relating to wall balance. a global the place ball popping is the one method to the scrotum's negative aesthetic features and real love can lead a guy to transpose menstruation throughout gender traces. let alone a blink so immensely strong that gentle abrasion can happen. there is additionally a lime.Truly a few of the strangest tales ever advised. In his debut assortment Matthew Revert has concocted a extraordinary vortex of fiction by means of turns hilarious, irritating, thought-provoking and simply simple ordinary. 1000000 types of correct will strength you in finding common sense within the illogic and shun something equivalent to universal sense.Like the faecal scrawl of a madman with out the disagreeable odor
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Extra resources for A Million Versions of Right
I lost all track of time. When my body finally gave in, there must have been close to a hundred tilers. The ongoing fight was full of violence. There were bloody corpses strewn throughout my room. Those still alive wouldn't give up. They were each determined to be the only one. * * * * * Once again I awoke to the sight of my father standing over me. As my vision cleared, it became apparent he was holding my testicles in his hand. They were no longer attached to my body. I slowly scanned the bedroom.
The board of tangential education sat before him, overbearing in height and number. Why must they insist on such implausibly tall chairs, he thought, their intense scrutiny still directed toward his diminutive frame. “First let me explain my motives, ladyfellows and gentlehaps of the tangential board. Who among you can honestly proclaim to remain unaffected by the dismal affront to anatomy that is the scrotum? Have you not caught glimpse of this putrid appendage and retched in disgust? Have you not questioned nature’s agenda and asked yourself why we haven’t been afforded the dignity that would accompany the internal concealment of the scrotum?
Implored Tina as her quiet tears evolved into violent sobbing. Mr Wilkens shrugged out of Tina’s grip and fell onto the bed in a ball of waste. He too began to cry in a piercing shriek that cracked all but four of Tina’s teeth. Tina began to intensify her wail, as if in competition with Mr Wilkens. The warbled, shrieks shattered mirrors and sternums as their tear ducts ran dry before pumping thick, black blood. Before communication could commence, they were involuntarily thrust into a whirling vortex of despair.